Slow Dialogue: With writer Arundhati Mishra

Interview by Payal Khandelwal

For the second edition of our ‘Slow Dialogue’ series, we speak with Arundhati Mishra - a writer, an entrepreneur, and a homemaker.

Since July 2023, Arundhati and her family - her husband and two daughters - have been on an adventure that most of us just end up dreaming about. Simply put, they packed up their belongings into storage and embarked on a year-long journey to travel the length and breadth of India, slowly. Of course, the reality is way more nuanced, filled with planning, preparations, logistics, homeschooling, navigating challenges on the move, taking risks, creating stability for a two-year old - all this and more leading to a beautiful, one-of-a-kind journey that has pleasantly surprised and fulfilled this adventurous family on the go.

We speak to Arundhati about their ongoing experiences and all the in-betweens. Excerpts below:

“Since this journey, our idea of home is shifting and evolving into something beautiful. Home is where my family is. It is where the daily chaos of parenting is found. It is in the slow mornings we now have the privilege of enjoying together...”

What really inspired this decision of taking a long break and travelling with your family around India in your #slowmobile?

A casual conversation in early 2023 sparked a dream: a year-long break from our routine life, exploring India as a family. We envisioned our girls gaining invaluable exposure to different cultures, our marriage thriving with uninterrupted quality time, and the four of us creating shared experiences as a family.

It was my husband (Jaison Ben) who thought of the idea first, but I instantly felt peace around this big life-altering decision. In our home, if we both are not onboard from the get-go, we don’t pursue the idea. With this one, we both felt excitement, thrill, and a tinge of anxiousness from the very beginning. We knew that was a good sign. We also knew that it meant taking a break from routine (which I love), stepping away from a life we’d known for over 10 years, and preparing for an adventure of a lifetime.

Months of planning ensued. July, marking the end of our daughter's school year, became our departure deadline for India. Jaison took the charge of carefully looking into our finances and budgeting for a year of comfortable road travel for our family. Meanwhile, I delved into homeschooling options, finding a curriculum that would let our daughter learn at her own pace. Two months before our scheduled departure from Dubai, we packed our stuff into storage, entrusted our business to friends, and Jaison officially resigned from his job. Landing in India with our "#SlowMobile", the adventure truly began.

Why did you choose 'Slow Travel'? What did it mean to you?

Slow travel is about savoring the present, like sipping Kehwa in a sun-dappled apple orchard while making music with our Kashmiri friends who own the apple farm (check @Jaisonsjukebox for more). It's learning the art of folding momos perfectly from our Nepali hostess and jotting down her secret Khow Suey recipe in Tadkah, Darjeeling (check @adaytobethankful for for more). It's sharing laughter and spice with Naga friends, developing a taste for axone.

Slow travel is to stop playing bystander and to pass through beauty, to be fully consumed by it. It's not just seeing, but feeling, absorbing every detail until it becomes a part of you. It's about collecting experiences, not souvenirs. This, for me, is the only way to truly travel. It's not about ticking off destinations, but cherishing each moment, each connection, each memory that makes the journey richer.

You have been on the road since September 2023 now! Tell us about your first destination Srinagar. And where all have you been to since then?

Srinagar was never on our minds. With everything we’d heard about Srinagar, it didn’t feel like a safe place. We were set for Himachal but just a week or so before we were leaving, we met a family friend from Kashmir. He spoke about the beauty of his land with so much love and nostalgia, it got us curious to see this place he was describing. We didn’t hesitate to change plans and set off for Kashmir. In Srinagar, we stayed with a Kashmiri family and the hospitality (or shall I say, mehmaan nawazi) we experienced made us extend our trip from five days to over 15!

Since Kashmir, we’ve been to Himachal, Uttar Pradesh, Bihar, West Bengal, Assam, Nagaland, and Meghalaya.

How do you create temporary homes and a sense of stability in all of these places? Are there any specific rituals/habits that remain constant and give you a feeling of home?

I love routine, so I took it upon myself to become the gatekeeper of preserving familiar family rituals. Little things like taking familiar books for the girls, stocking up on their usual snacks when possible, reading at bedtime, calling it a day with prayer - these are a few things we kept constant. For my two year old, the experience has been a bit unsettling at times, so we quickly learnt to plan our time on the road around her napping schedule. While booking our stays, we were especially mindful of looking for places where cooking our meals was possible. Simple homemade meals after a long day of exploring a new destination can do wonders to create a sense of comfort.

“Slow travel is to stop playing bystander and to pass through beauty, to be fully consumed by it. It's not just seeing, but feeling, absorbing every detail until it becomes a part of you.”

What has been one of the best and the most challenging moments of your travels so far?

On our way to Srinagar, we got stuck in a traffic jam on the Jammu-Srinagar highway. What should've taken us seven hours, turned into a grueling 14! Construction delays are apparently common but we weren't aware of this. Now, with a two year old baby and the setting sun, things felt tense. We ate apples and some savoury snacks we had at hand. Our phones had lost connectivity, because only the local network works in Kashmir. This meant that we had to do a bit of guesswork to find our host's house. Lost and unplanned, a flicker of regret tugged at me - a yearning for my warm bed and home. Finally, at 3 am we stumbled upon our host's house and entered sheepishly, apologising for the late arrival. We were met with warmth and a homemade meal. Exhausted as we were, the genuine kindness extinguished our remaining hunger pangs. What started as a stressful ordeal ended in unexpected hospitality, reminding us that sometimes, even the best journeys begin with detours.

The best moments come to me in tiny bursts of joy. Home-cooked meals shared with friends, jam sessions by the lakeside, giggling boat rides with the girls, stargazing from our forest cottage - these seemingly small moments scattered throughout our trip became the highlights of our trip.

What do you hope that your daughters learn during this trip about travel, the idea of home, and meeting new people from different cultures? How has the homeschooling experience been so far?

It was my deepest desire that my girls get to see a life beyond the comforts of Dubai. I wanted them to taste different foods, make friends from different cultures, and experience a new way of life. Since this journey, our idea of home is shifting and evolving into something beautiful. Home is where my family is. It is where the daily chaos of parenting is found. It is in the slow mornings we now have the privilege of enjoying together. It's cooking those family favourite meals in a new kitchen. Home is the safety and comfort we find in each other even when we're on the go.

As a first-time homeschooling mom, at first it felt daunting. However, we slowly found our rhythm and I started enjoying the flexibility and ease it gave us. Some days we struggle with routine and discipline but most of the time we have really good days.

What's your plan going ahead - is this a sabbatical or a way of life now? And what advice would you give to families contemplating a similar path of long-term travel and exploration?

We're only halfway through our epic adventure so it's a bit difficult to fully answer this one. What we do know now is that we love travelling this way and will be doing more of it in the future.

I'd say if a family decides to travel this way, they should just follow the plan. Good budgeting and courage is all you'll need to get started. The experiences along the way will ensure that you keep going.

I like to end with this quote from Big Panda and Tiny Dragon that really encapsulates my thoughts on this family adventure we're on - ‘Which is more important,’ asked Big Panda, ‘the journey or the destination?’ ‘The company,’ said Tiny Dragon.